I Will Always Be the Last To Leave

Now this can be seen as a positive or a negative. I like to focus on the former.
When I started CrossFit it scared me. It made me nervous and gave me anxiety to work out in front of people whom I deemed so much more fit than I. Being the judgmental human being that I am, I automatically assumed that every single person in that box thought the same way I did.
As any person with a motivational soul will tell you, those other people are not the focus of your work out; you are. In my mind, CrossFit is firstly about the internal competition. Man vs. Himself before Man vs. Man becomes a thing. Pardon my use of literary themes to explain myself, although it is the best way I know how to explain anything. The last time I had a job interview I used the example of “Ender’s Game” to explain how I felt about empathy. Anyway, I’m digressing, as usual.
My first actual WOD in a class at CrossFit Dixie went terribly and made me feel like I was on the verge of death, as anyones first WOD does.
But I knew I could do better if I focused on the technique of what I was doing rather than wondering if the person two spots away from me noticed how far behind everyone I was. They didn’t, and they never do. This should be one of the only times in your life in which you should be stoked that no one gives a shit about you or what you are doing at that particular moment in time. Once I came to that realization that no one cared about what I was doing unless I asked them to look, I felt much freer about everything I did from then on.
On a side note, I think that is why I don’t enjoy regular gyms anymore. You know, those places with machines and mirrors. I tend to at least stay away from the gym during the time window in which the high school football/baseball/rugby players invade and stare at themselves doing bicep curls and incorrect power cleans. I think my shift in focus toward technique vs. quantity and weight has given me OCD in that sense.
However, I can’t say I dislike the high school kiddos for being there. At least they’re there. But when I see them doing things wrong and then telling all their friends how to do the thing the wrong way is kind of the equivalent of me saying “At least you’re reading a book,” because you picked up a copy of “Fifty Shades of Grey”.

I’ve completely lost what I was talking about, I apologize. Let’s recap.

• Don’t worry what people think because they don’t care what you’re doing while they’re in the middle of their third set of box jump burpees.
• Focus on how you are doing it, not how many you are doing. Y’all don’t want to get hurt because you are eager to hit that weight that is way too much for you.

Obviously, go hard during your work out, whatever it is, but don’t get cray, as the kids say. If you know how to do it correctly then start adding that weight and building up that max rep count. Recovering from an accidental injury because you think you are unstoppable is not worth a little extra time improving on the fundamentals.
Which brings me back to my original point: I was always the last to finish. Always. Still am. At first, I could feel my pride smoldering away and getting discouraged, but then I started staying at the box long after everyone else had finished and gossiped with their friends and left the premises. From there, I started always being the last to leave.
I work on technique most of the time, but there were weeks during which I would stay after the class and just doing an extra 100 pull-ups with a resistance band to build up strength. During those times I would still focus on how I was doing the specific movement rather than how quickly I got it done.
This morning I did a WOD containing power cleans. I injured my left arm about a month ago and this week has been the first week since then that I’ve even attempted cleaning again. I noticed my elbows were weird, as they used to be when I first started lifting. After the workout I drank a protein shake and a bottle of water, chilled for a few minutes, then focused on my elbows for a few reps. Then I noticed my pull could be better. I looked at that for a bit. I eventually added more weight and did a few sets of cleans and front squats.
By this point everyone was gone and the coach was in the front office, having left me to my own devices, though I’m sure he would’ve been more than willing to watch my form if I’d asked him. I have before.
Who cares when you finish? As long as you do better the seventh time than how you did the first time, I’d call that improvement. Give it all you’ve got, but feel comfortable with what you’re doing. As long as you are fully paying attention to what you are doing you will do your best.
Do it right first, then do it better the second time.
Also, read good books.
Cheers.
 Song of the day:

Not sure what it is about this song but it makes me feel a lot of feels. Enjoy.

[originally posted on http://ozonated.tumblr.com/]